Sending Nudes Is Not a Love Language

It’s the 13th of February.

Kampala is already warming up. Florists are arranging red roses. Gift vendors are dusting off teddy bears that have been waiting all year for this weekend. Restaurants are confirming bookings. Soft life captions are being drafted and saved in Notes apps, ready for midnight posting.

Tomorrow, bouquets will be delivered in Kampala traffic. Boda Bodas will weave through jam carrying surprises wrapped in red. Instagram will be loud with “My Person ❤️.”

And somewhere between tonight and tomorrow, someone will receive this message:

“Babe… send me something nice.”

“Just for me.”

“I promise I won’t show anyone.”

Let’s talk before tomorrow arrives.

You know that song that starts playing every February?

“Valentine is coming…

Where is your boyfriend?

Your mates are getting flowers…”

It’s funny. It’s playful. We all laugh.

But underneath it? There is pressure.

Pressure to have someone.

Pressure to post someone.

Pressure to prove something.

And sometimes, that pressure quietly shifts from flowers and dinner reservations… to requests you are not comfortable with.

Sending nudes is not a love language.

It may feel like intimacy. It may feel like trust. It may feel like “we are serious.” But in our screenshot generation, what feels private can quickly become permanent.

Let’s be honest about our reality.

Phones get stolen in taxis.

Phones are snatched downtown.

Accounts are hacked.

Relationships end.

People change.

And sometimes, heartbreak does not stay private.

What was once “just between us” becomes a forwarded image in a boys’ group. A screenshot saved somewhere you cannot access. A silent tool for manipulation. A story that spreads faster than truth.

Not every relationship survives.

But the internet? It keeps receipts.

I know someone will say, “But I trust him.”

Or, “But I trust her.”

Trust is beautiful. It is necessary. But digital content does not disappear when trust does. Once something leaves your camera roll, it is no longer just yours. It can be copied, backed up, screenshotted, forwarded, recovered — even years later.

Even good people can act differently when hurt. Even stable relationships can collapse. Even secure phones can be compromised.

Love should never require proof through exposure.

Let’s talk about pressure again.

“If you love me, prove it.”

“Why are you being childish?”

“Other girls send.”

“Other guys send.”

And suddenly that Valentine’s song is playing in your head again. Your mates are getting flowers. The timeline is loud. Everyone looks coupled up. Soft life is trending.

So you think, maybe just this once.

That is how pressure works. Not dramatic. Not violent. Just small nudges that feel harmless — until they aren’t.

Your body is not a loyalty test.

Your image is not a Valentine’s gift.

Your dignity is not a bargaining chip.

And for the parents, aunties, uncles, big sisters reading this — this conversation cannot start after crisis. It must start before. Not after a leak. Not after tears. Not after whispers. Young people do not need threats. They need digital wisdom. They need safe spaces. They need adults who will speak without shame.

This Valentine’s, give flowers. Give words. Give effort. Give respect. But do not give something that can be screenshotted and weaponized.

Because cyber safety is not just about protecting bank accounts and office networks. It is about protecting your name. Your future. Your peace of mind.

And if love is real, it will never demand what could one day destroy you.

If you’ve made it this far, I’m going to assume we’re friends now, right? And what do friends do? They like, they comment, and they definitely stay in touch!

So, why not take this friendship to the next level? Sign up for my weekly newsletter—it’s packed with good reads, tips, and zero spam (I promise, your inbox won’t hate me). Just a little nugget of knowledge and fun, delivered to you with love.

I swear I won’t overload your inbox with endless emails or spammy sales pitches. Just good content, great stories, and a few cyber-safety tips sprinkled in for good measure. Plus, I’m always down for a conversation in the comments, so don’t be shy—leave a thought, a question, or just a friendly hello!

Your inbox deserves something fresh, right? 😉

Until next time, I remain yours stealthily, TheCyberMamushka 🥷

Take a Reader Survey